The rates are up because we’re older and fatter:


I am a reformed hippy. I would have opted for a natural birth in my early thirties. Four C-sections later, I still feel a little ripped off, but I console myself with the thought that I could breast feed a small African tribe should I be called up to do so. 

It’s swings and roundabouts with childbearing. My advice is just do your own research and listen to your Mama Bear instinct before you let anyone cut you open. However you very rarely have any choice.

Sometimes I insert the word ‘perineum’ into a sentence to see if I can catch people flinching:
As in: ” Did you see my perineum? I just had it pruned,”
” It’s right over there next to the shrub roses”.
” The agapanthus”, I say; my visitor smiles in relief and we carry on around the garden.
Yell it out at a wedding breakfast for a real showstopper. During the toasts.

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